My first mugging.
So, bored with eating alone in my hotel, I thought I’d try to find another restaurant nearby. A few blocks away from my hotel (in a nice neighborhood in Quito), two young guys asked me in Spanish if they could borrow my phone. As I tried to explain in Spanish that I don’t have a phone that works in Quito, one of them grabbed my arms while the other started reaching into my pockets. As they weren’t too large or intimidating (nor was I in the mood to be mugged), their attempt to get my wallet was a complete failure.
Some advice to my young, failed muggers:
1. If you’re gonna try to mug me at least bring a knife or a gun. Idiots.
2. Think about mugging someone smaller than yourself. I’m not a large guy, but I grew up with a brother who was about 6’5 and 300 pounds. So you weren’t going to get too far.
3. Just because I look like a mestizo doesn’t mean I’m rich. If you’d actually gotten my wallet, you would’ve been $8 and 10 Bolivianos richer.
I’d say better luck next time, but I wouldn’t mean it. I hope you either go back to school or end up in prison.
